No matter how blissfully content you were in your relationship before March 2020, there’s no denying that the global pandemic certainly shook things up a bit. As cases begin to rise, almost everyone has been thrust out of their comfort zones and are faced with living in a scary, new reality with no return to normalcy in sight.
Goh Seow Chung (left) and Lim Yiling (right) met each other for the first time at INTI International College Subang and later found out they were running for the INTIMA (Student Council) elections together.
While many individuals experienced their own set of challenges, one of the biggest concerns for most couples was how to co-exist together in this very strange and ever-present new normal.
For most couples, whether they were in the midst of planning their weddings or were already decades into a happy marriage, the experience of surviving a pandemic side-by-side was unlikely to be one they had ever prepared for or thought they’d find themselves in.
Despite the economic, mental and emotional challenges arising from the pandemic, however, many couples have come out stronger, becoming closer during the process and learning some valuable life lessons that they believe they will carry with throughout the rest of their lives together.
“It was indeed a very challenging period especially when we were trying to cope with life as parents again.”
Young parents, Goh Seow Chung and Lim Yiling, both 33 years old, had their second child just as the Movement Control Order (MCO) 1.0 was announced.
“Having to care for a newborn and a 3-year-old toddler, coupled with the ongoing inconvenience and restrictions, as well as the fear of what this pandemic entailed was indeed a very challenging period, especially when we were trying to cope with life as parents to a newborn again,” expressed Yiling.
Having just delivered her baby and going back through the motions post pregnancy, Yiling opened up about how the pandemic seemed to have hit her harder compared to Seow Chung.
“Whilst I’m grateful that I didn’t have to juggle working from home compared to my working spouse, staying almost completely at home for the past year has not been easy. My husband had to return to his workplace on a regular basis as the industry he is working with is considered an essential service. This left me being a solo parent to a toddler and a baby while he was away at work,” admitted Yiling.
Despite their individual struggles and the hurdles of navigating the new normal with young children, the both of them continued to work as a team. While Yiling was at home looking after the children, Seow Chung felt blessed to be able to have a job during a crisis and was relieved to be able to put food on the table.
Seow Chung said, “I am very fortunate that my employer was able to operate and I could work through the pandemic. I know many families faced layoffs during this time, and had troubles keeping themselves afloat. So having a stable income and being able to provide for my family was something I was very grateful for.”
While they made the most of their circumstances, COVID-19 has still been a bit of a killjoy for this couple as they were not able to celebrate certain milestones and festivals with their extended families and friends. Celebrations like their baby’s full moon, birthdays and even Christmas were kept simple and minimal to minimize any risk to the family, but they were still thankful to have their immediate family members with them.
Clarissa Valerine Egbert (left) and Anthony Jonathan Daniel (right) started dating in August 2010 and got married more than a year later in November 2011.
In the midst of juggling their roles as parents and adapting to the changes around them, this couple also decided to push themselves a little further. While many individuals pulled the breaks on their personal and professional plans, this couple moved forward by enrolling together for the Master of Business Administration (MBA) in International Marketing programme in collaboration with Coventry University, UK at INTI International College Subang.
“We saw this MBA programme as another achievement in our lives, one that we could accomplish together, and I hoped that it would set a good example to our children to keep moving forward, even when things get tough,” shared Seow Chung.
Although optimistic about their journey together, Seow Chung is aware of the challenges of juggling multiple responsibilities, but is confident that they will sail through successfully as they have a strong support system.
“The biggest concern we have is making arrangements for our children while we attend classes or study. But we are blessed with an amazing support system that will undoubtedly make it possible for us. These people have been with us through thick and thin, and I strongly believe that Yiling and myself will be able to attend classes during the weekends with peace of mind because of them,” affirmed Seow Chung.
Sharing her thoughts for those from the younger generation who may have been pushing away the idea of pursuing their education as they juggle their daily lives, Yiling said, “Bite the bullet. I always try to put time into perspective and pursuing this programme will really only take us a year, full time. As cliché as it may sound, a year passes by in a blink of an eye, so why not get it over and done with! Weirdly enough, the pandemic may be the biggest motivator for us to turn our lives around — why not get a qualification while #stayingathome. Imagine ending the year on a high with a Masters qualification to your name?”
While the pandemic will come and go, the love, understanding and positivity shared between this vibrant couple seems to be set to last forever.
As shared by Yiling, “I think we’ll just need to soldier on, weather through tough times and do this as a team!”
“Almost ten years on and we’re still learning new things about each other, which makes for one interesting love story we’ll have for the children in the future.”
Anthony Jonathan Daniel and Clarissa Valerine Egbert have been married for nine years and have three lovely daughters they adore. Their lives revolved around their children, but lately they have added on something else to their list of accomplishments together, pursuing their degree!
“My main motivation for pursuing my higher education was my three young daughters. I want them to understand the value of education in today’s society and the opportunities it holds to help them succeed in life; this is something my late parents imparted to me all my life and although it has taken me years to finally buckle down and pursue it, I want my girls to see that it’s never too late. I’m also motivated to show them that while it is a challenge and a struggle, the end result is a better and improved me,” shared Clarissa, who has also encouraged her husband to do the same.
“My wife has been my biggest motivator and cheerleader from day one. It is because of her that I finally got into studying,” Anthony said, proudly. He also added, “My wife and I have been married for many years now; we have come around to understanding our strengths and weaknesses as it is very crucial while we are trying to study and manage the family all at one go.”
Anthony and Clarissa are currently pursuing their longtime dream, studying the Bachelor of Business (Hons) Human Resource Management, Learning Simplified (BBUS LS) programme, a fully online degree programme at INTI International University, Nilai.
“Prior to this, I only had a Sijil Pelajaran Malaysia certificate I obtained in 1998. The day arrived when I knew I needed to upskill to climb the corporate ladder, because with my inadequate educational qualification I knew I would remain stagnant till I retire. Having my wife as my support system, I decided to face my fears and enrolled in the degree course last March,” explained Anthony.
While Anthony and Clarissa were still adjusting themselves to being students all over again, the pandemic struck, and as the nation began its lockdown to curb the deadly virus, so too did the journey of being at home as a family begin for Anthony and Clarissa.
“To be honest, the pandemic put a huge strain in our relationship as a couple. With the whole lockdown, we started to realize the many small elements we took for granted and that sort of hit a sore spot in our relationship. People underestimate the importance of having time to yourself; time away from family. That pace you have built for yourself outside of home with work and other priorities helps you focus on yourself before getting back home where family depend on you and need you to always be on the ball,” Clarissa opened up.
She added, “The pandemic was a realization of these little things we miss. By God’s grace, we are learning to navigate through our difference in opinions and I believe each day is a new day for me to become a better person. Almost ten years on and we’re still learning new things about each other which makes for one interesting love story that we can share with the children in the future. Whether you’ve been married for four or forty years, I believe relationships are a continuous work in progress; and that makes life all the more exciting!”
Although Clarissa admits that relationships are a continuous work in progress, she and her husband are definitely acing it, even in the midst of enriching themselves with a degree.
The both of them agreed that, “When you have an encouraging partner that you can lean on, you will realize that your achievements will be worth all the struggles in the end. With the support of each other, we have been able to celebrate the highs and power through our low moments.